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B&D - light

7 November 2013 2 comments

Last Thursday night, on Halloween, I found myself at the foot of the stage of my favourite Perth strip club, the Voodoo Lounge. Here, with great amusement, I watched Mistress Tokyo entertain us all by enthusiastically trussing up and bounding a sexy lady from the audience. Mistress Tokyo, who is one of Australia's foremost authorities on rope and bondage, was flown in from over east as the 'main event' for the club's annual Fetish Ball. This year's ball had a military and medical theme, although many guests decided to come in leather, latex and other fetish gear.

Rope TyingRope Tying

So there I was dressed in military, on a 'school night', with my girlfriend Trace, a couple of the store managers and our two warehouse managers from Canberra (who were over for the weekend) amazed that Perth has quite a strong fetish scene. Being surrounded by Fetlife characters, and some nudity on-stage, was for me an unusual way to spend a Thursday night. The Fetish Ball lived up to its reputation and was a fantastic night out. Every now and then I think it's good to venture out of your normal routine!

In May last year store sales soared to 70% over budget. And they stayed high for a number of months. Given general retail conditions at the time were quite subdued the sales increase shocked me. It was only after detailed analysis of what customers were buying, along with feedback from our staff, did we ascertain that the increase in sales was driven entirely by the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy. Overnight the author E. L. James and her trilogy had become a success and the adult retail industry was reaping the financial benefits!

Whilst we actually sold the trilogy in-store, it was the sale of restraints, masks, light bondage kits and special bondage rope that set our sales on fire. The sale of Ben Wa balls also sky rocketed. Actually we sold out of them very quickly and couldn't source any worldwide for a while - such was the huge demand. Some of our vibrators sold really well too as these were also featured in the trilogy.

I decided to read the three books as I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. I'd seen it all over Facebook, where many female readers referred to it as mummy porn. Actually most adult industry leaders believe it was social media like Facebook and Twitter, along with bloggers, who were responsible for the phenomenal success of the books.

Whilst the trilogy certainly wasn't 'highbrow' reading it was entertaining. I could immediately see how some women were hooked on the fantasy character Christian Grey. He almost sounded like the perfect man - devilishly handsome, articulate, charming, business savvy, incredibly wealthy, muscular, well hung and a rampant libido like a teenager! This is what I believe attracted women to his character, not his need for dishing out extreme physical punishment in his 'red room of pain'. To most women this is unappealing...but many women are happy to try some light 'slap and tickle'. Yes, some women like light domination from time to time and Fifty Shades really gave them the tick of approval that it was OK to give it a go and it was OK to talk about it with their friends.

On a flight from Perth to Sydney last year, whilst I was reading Fifty Shades, I struck up a number of discussions from fellow fliers and a couple of the hosties. Everyone was eager to talk about the book. And everyone was keen to discuss the sex in it, particularly after I told them I owned Complete strangers were insistent on discussing their sexual fantasises with me. Yes Fifty Shades was on many people's lips!

Often women want to be ravished by a man! I think this was also a lot of the appeal of Christian Grey. In a world where we understand that no usually means no, it became no means yes, unless of course you use the safe word. A safe word is something that B&D participants use as an absolute stop to whatever they're doing (ie. if it becomes painful or they simply don't want to do it anymore).

Last year I had a number of my buddies complain to me about their wives and girlfriends who'd read Fifty Shades. Apparently their partner's sex drive went through the roof and they wanted a lot more sex than they'd been getting. I have read that many couples worldwide had relationship problems, and some even split up, because of the unrealistic expectations created by the book. One of my buddies in particular constantly whined to me that he simply couldn't keep up with his wife's sexual demands. She wanted it morning, noon and night every day. He even resorted to not showering at night after the gym hoping his wife would leave him alone in bed at night. Thankfully they got over this little hump in their relationship although I'm sure most married men would relish this frequency of sex!

So if you're in the mood for some "cheeky" love...whether you enjoy the hot and prickly sensation of a smacked bottom or the opportunity to explore your submissive side, erotic spanking can be a great way to spice up your sex life. If you need a bit of help with how to get this party started, then here's my top tips for the spanking novice!

  1. Play by the RulesDiscuss your limits; tell your partner what you're willing to try and what you absolutely won't do.
  2. Start with a gentle warm upTry running your fingers lightly over your partner's buttocks (more like tickling). Your first spank should be more of a caress than a slap. Follow each spank with a short massage to keep things nice and warm. You should smack upwards...cleanly and crisply!
  3. Set the MoodLike any erotic activity, it's important to set the mood before letting loose on your partner's behind. If he or she isn't sufficiently aroused, the spanking won't be erotic, just painful – and not in a good way.
  4. Experiment with TechniqueWhen it comes to the actual spanking start slowly, you may even want to start over jeans or underwear first. Gently build up intensity and vary the pressure and strokes.
  5. After-Spank Quality TimeThe time spent after a spanking sessions is just as important as the actual spanking itself. It is important to discuss what you both did and did not like. A little cuddle or a massage might be welcome. Even a soothing bubble bath is an excellent way to bond after a spanking session

Another time I'll give you some tips on rope tying, bondage and restraints. Whilst I'm no 'master dom' I do have my own 'burgundy room' which coincidentally I set up long before I'd even heard of Fifty Shades.

As always I'd love to hear your comments.

Delivering passion and pleasure.


anno 8 November 2013 at 4:55 am
what are some other good strip clubs you have been to...
Natasha 8 November 2013 at 4:53 pm
Loving the blogs Mal, you have one of the most fascinating fun filled lives - I mean not everyone gets the special treatment of a strip club at halloween. Reading your blog about Fifty Shades made me chuckle a little...When the books first came out I sent a email to one of the Retail Managers at to advise them the Christian Grey fits the description of "Malcolm Day".....Looking forward to the moving coming out soon :)
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